Grieving better, How?

 

Today, last year, at 12:45 AM my Dad passed on in his sleep. His passing sent my family in shock and completely heartbroken, as it was all so sudden. He was excited to go for a long trip.  Dad was fine just before he slept, or so we thought.  

I have not been the same person since.

How have I been?  I'm getting by.  

I'm cruising through this life after losing Dad (and then friends) one day at a time — paying close attention to trigger points so as not to tickle the bp type 2 extreme mood cycles.  Why so?

I learned that grief can trigger many different and unexpected emotions.  Any wrong choice will send me to mania or worse, depression.  So you might be wondering as to how I've been coping from losing so many of my loved ones and dear friends last year.  

With that in mind, I've listed some of the things I've done myself that might help you too to better cope from losing a loved one:

1) Buy yourself some peace -I found that one very effective way to mourn and cope is to accord yourself some peace and quiet from people and things you can live without.  There's no better time to cut ties with things and people that do everything but make you happy.

2) Surround yourself with supportive family   and friends - Only listen to people who are willing to give the heavy lifting when you're so down.  Don't allow yourself to be swallowed whole by people's negative demeanor and ridiculous expectations.

3) Openly talk or write about your loss as often as you can - When you miss someone, you might find yourself feeling overwhelmed by just about everything.  Having an avenue to express your grief to mourn will greatly help you to cope.

4) Choose happy moments to hold on to -Celebrate the good life that your loved one lived by sharing them to others what they were like.  Remember, stories just might inspire another person to cope from grieving too.

5) Cry when you can, as much as you can - Cry your hardest when you get the chance.  It's up to you whether you'll cry alone, with other people around or with someone you trust to be there for you when you're at your most vulnerable.

6) Help yourself - While it's better you're with people that will support you, there's no better person to help you overcome grief but yourself.  Remember that the people you rely on also have their own lives and may well be going through rough circumstances themselves.

7) Shun negativity - As for me, other than laying low from friends get together, one of the things that has tremendously been helping me to cope is, shunning social media.  Without the depressing black profile photos you get to see in your news feed plus sensationalized news, the better.  Just see it as something that is one less thing that will make you sad or anxious. 

Having lost close to 10 people in my life last year, it was just way too much for me to handle mentally.  These are only some of the things I'm currently doing to get through mourning.  

Don't get me wrong, I am still grieving.  Writing about what I feel makes my grieving a little lighter.  While I know that my method of coping may not work for everyone, here's to hoping that it could reach to someone that might actually find my blog helpful.  

Moreover, grieving better in no way means fast tracking emotions to move on from the pain of losing a loved one.  It is merely written from my standpoint having been suffering from bp type 2 with the intention to ease an intense emotional stress, a stimulus that can send an unguided mentally unstable individual to a dark abyss.

Until next time here on Kaye's Notes.